Monday, February 23, 2015

I should have learned my lesson with their "Tomato Florentine" (see earlier post) but I wanted to give Progresso one more chance to prove they can make a palatable tomato soup. But I guess I'll never know, because after this I'm not buying any more of their tomato varieties. If you want to experience the actual taste of "Creamy Tomato with Bacon and Cheese" (sounds wonderful, doesn't it?), then simply pour a can of tomato sauce into a pan, heat, and eat.  "Creamy Tomato with Bacon and Cheese" isn't creamy enough to offset the effect of "acid tomato", and there is no detectable flavor of bacon or cheese.

I've spent years walking past their tomato varieties.  I'm happy to resume.

Monday, February 16, 2015

We're very fond of Newman's Own frozen pizza but it's pricey, so I decided to try a cheaper brand.  And since I love cheese, this mouth-watering box photo caught my eye.  But let me ask you--  Do you see a layer of tomato sauce under that cheese? Neither do I.  But that is what you get--a thick layer of tomato sauce with a (very) thin layer of cheese on top.  Any cheese flavor is completely overwhelmed by the tomato sauce and salt content of this product.  In fact, the basic taste experience is "tomato sauce", not cheese, and certainly not anything remotely approaching the exciting 4-cheese description you see in that blue bar on the front of the package.  In conclusion, I recommend that the Red Baron stick to flying planes.  A pizza-maker he ain't.

Monday, February 9, 2015

I'm not a big fan of commercially baked cookies. They're all too sweet and I don't like the superfine texture. But now and then I succumb.  It happens I would truly enjoy a mid-morning snack to go with my tea (Like the British, I indulge in "elevenses" most days) but I have yet to find anything that satisfies without being overly sweet and/or gooey.  This cookie/coffee-cake hybrid (or so the wording on the bag suggests) seemed like it might be just the thing.  And then I tried it.

Really, it's just another cookie, and not a very good one at that.  For one thing, it's soggy (I've noticed that "soft-baked" in commercially baked cookies tends to come across as "under-baked"; no exception here).  There's nothing "cinnamon bun" about it except for an aspect of the flavor (the other aspect is pumpkin and I've never liked pumpkin). 

I will have to "re-imagine" my morning some other way.  In the meantime, if anybody reading this is in the mood for a cinnamon bun, then I suggest you buy an actual cinnamon bun.  This product will not deliver the same experience.

Monday, February 2, 2015

This seemed like a good idea at the time.

I should pause and explain something.  I am such an easily disappointed person that I have a grading system for my degree of disappointment with #1 being a mere shrug and #10 being a howling, flailing tantrum of outrage. That said, I would place my reaction to the above product somewhere around #3-4.

The soup is nowhere near as thick and lumpy as depicted in that appetizing box photo. I would describe the taste experience as "overly-salty white sauce with an occasional diced potato."

Oh, all right.  You want to know my entire grading system.  Very well:

1 -- shrug
2 -- "nothing to write home about"
3 -- thumb down
4 -- thumb down and head shake
5 -- two thumbs down
6 -- two thumbs down and head shake
7 -- wincing recoil and words like "ugh," "eew," "bletch."
8 -- wincing recoil, explosive raspberry (after swallowing)
9 -- wincing recoil, explosive raspberry (pre-swallowing; stand back); headlong rush to scrape item down sink disposer.
10 - "AAAAAAAACK," "EEEEWWW," *GAG**GAG**GAG* 
(flailing/stomping, possibly throwing self on floor) (Hey, why hold back?)